1903 The Flowing Bowl by Edward Spencer

aoo THE FLOWING BOWL were occasionally handed up to him by the usher, for reference, slipped from his grasp, and docu mentary testimony flew all over the counsels' wigs. At length the notice of the judge was attracted to the state of things. "What is the matter with that witness.?" asked his lordship. " Is he trifling with the court ? " "M'lord," said counsel for the plaintiff, "I am instructed that the witness is what may be called a free-liver, and that it is often necessary for him toswallow a dram in the morning, before proceeding to business. I am also instructed that the witness overslept himself this morning, and had no time to procure the necessary dose, before appearing as a witness before your lord ship." "Tut, tut!" exclaimed the judge. "This is wasting the time of the court. Let him be removed at once to the waiting-room and dosed with old brandy." He was a practical judge ; and in five minutes' time that accountant had pulled himself together. And an even more painful case than the above is within my memory. A certain news paper-proprietor was in the habit of paying the weekly wages of his staff himself, each member having to sign a receipt for the reward of merit. The fashion - editor — a hardened libertine — turned up one Saturday, before his chief, absolutely incapable of signing his name, or any part of it. His gait was all right, as was his speech ; but the pen slipped through his fingers as though it had been a well-oiled icicle. The